Authentic Connection
A friend sent this article to me last night saying "Someone posted this and I thought of how this is exactly what you have and continue to build." The beginning of this article hit all too close to home and I flashed back to walking into Michael's funeral mass. The sea of people, that seemed like a blend of black, grey and white, were highlighted by the sun that shone through the windows of the church. I held two little hands in each one of mine and walked slowly behind the love of my life in a casket, looking up at the crucifix and reminding myself that I never walk alone in my spirituality and faith but also amongst the living -- evident by the church full of people who who were extending love to us.
At one point I glanced to my left and caught the eye of a woman who I know through my recovery program and I gave her a wink and a nod, acknowledging that I see you and I know you see me, my friend.
CONNECTION.
Here is what I know, I have always been outgoing, played team sports, had a big group of friends, and a family that loves me. I can't say that I always had deep and meaningful connections with people, like I do now. I had two very good friends in high school that really knew and know me today, but most people were "friends".
Last night I was thinking about why connection now is more intimate and possible with both friends as well as strangers like the officer I met the other day?
The answer, for me, is right at the end of the article where she said "if I die, my kids will be surrounded by people who love them, warts and all."
This is the critical piece for me in building deep and meaningful connection with others... I had to first get to a place where I was authentic in who I am (warts and all), stripped of any shame and in full acceptance or where I have been and who I am. Once I loved and embraced myself for who I am, only then could I embrace others at a much deeper and connected level, leaving judgement at the door.
Not sure if this makes sense?
I no longer pretended, or hid, or had shame about mistakes or what I "should" have done or been someone or something else (should is a four letter swear word in our house). I no longer held onto stories about myself that were not true and accepted that I am safe, loved and whole. This was me, all of me, which enabled an authentic connection of my true self and creates space for others to show up with me, guard down, arms down, and veil down.
The other part of connection for me is training my mind to be in the present moment, the holy instant I am living in, right here and right now. If I am planning the future or wallowing in the past, then connection isn't possible.
I am still humbled by the outpouring of love and support from the community, our church, past and current employers, my RF community, our school community and the most amazing human beings I run into throughout my day. Perfect "strangers" who become friends, teachers, lessons and miracles in my day.
Let’s connect, I would be honored to be a part of your connected community XO
Here is the article https://qz.com/1570179/how-to-make-friends-build-a-community-and-create-the-life-you-want/?utm_source=parIC&cid=sf01002&fbclid=IwAR3Y0D4jUYjNT1odNYFySJaKfmehdosCrRoL3RbpJ0kinW7w3cHPGQcch-8
#ConnectAndBeWell #GratefulHeart #Peace #Love #WidowsWords #MissingMichael #Community #Framily #AYearOfMiracleThinking